Mo Memes Called Bayern a "Geneva Convention Violation" and Honestly That's Too Kind

Right. Mo Memes wrote a piece ranking the "seven levels of Stop They're Already Dead" in football history, using Bayern Munich's 102 league goals as the jumping off point. Clever stuff. Funny lad. Probably took him twenty minutes between TikToks. But here's the thing. He's not wrong. He's just not angry enough about it.

See, Mo treats this like a meme. Like it's content. Like Bayern battering St. Pauli 102 times in a season is some sort of internet joke to be catalogued and ranked. I watched football when a 3-0 win was considered ruthless. When a team scoring 80 in a season got talked about for decades. Now we've got Bayern putting up numbers that look like a cricket scorecard and everyone just goes "lol dead league" and moves on to the next reel.

102 goals. The season is STILL GOING. That's not dominance. That's not even a crime scene, Mo. That's the chalk outline after everyone's gone home.

You know what used to happen when a team got too good? The other clubs bought better players. Managers adapted. Defences got organised. Now? The Bundesliga just watches Bayern hoover up every decent player in Germany like some sort of footballing Dyson and shrugs. "That's just how it is." No it isn't. It's a structural failure. But nobody wants to hear that because it doesn't fit in a meme format, does it.

Mo's ranking is funny. I'll give him that. Level one through seven. Very neat. Very tidy. Very internet. But he's missing level eight. Level eight is what I call "The Point Where You Realise the League Itself Has Given Up." That's where Bayern live. Permanently. They don't just win the Bundesliga. They make the Bundesliga look like something you'd organise at a stag do in Magaluf.

And before anyone says "oh Andy, you're just bitter because you're old," yes. Correct. I am old. I am bitter. But I'm also right. Football is supposed to be competitive. That's the whole point. Two teams. One ball. Uncertainty. Drama. Not one team turning up like the final boss in a video game while everyone else plays for the privilege of losing by fewer than four.

You want to know what really gets me? VAR can spend fourteen minutes checking whether a player's armpit hair was offside, but nobody in football governance can look at Bayern scoring 102 goals in a league season and think "hang on, maybe something's gone a bit wrong here." Priorities. Absolute shambles.

Mo called it a Geneva Convention violation. That implies there are rules being broken. There are no rules being broken. That's the problem. Bayern are doing exactly what the system allows them to do. Hoard talent. Crush opposition. Repeat. It's not illegal. It's just deeply, profoundly boring.

Good piece though, Mo. Genuinely. Made me laugh. Then made me sad. Then made me angry. Which is basically my standard Tuesday.

102 goals. In my day that would have caused a parliamentary inquiry. Now it's a meme tier list. Football. Finished.